I often ask myself why? Why do we get so caught up in the stories of our lives that all too often we become disconnected from the reality of it. I see it everyday in the lives of people who deserve to be happy and yet can't find happiness. I suppose you are wondering what I mean by that and I will try and explain it.
We have all been through some difficult times in our lives. They say that struggles are a part of the process of living and like it or not, we spend a great deal of time trying to make choices to avoid what will hurt us. We teach our children to stay away from strangers, to watch both ways when they cross the street and to work hard so that they don't fail. We are all programmed from an early age to watch out for danger and so we live our lives being aware that we must avoid anything that could harm us.
Unfortunately no matter how careful we are, we all experience some degree of hurt, loss, betrayal, failure and pain. When it happens, we try to deal with it using our limited experience, often based on our past and up-bringing. As we do, we quiet naturally make up a story about it in our heads because each and every one of us is a storyteller about our own lives. The trouble is that our stories are not always true. Too many times, they are based on our interpretations of what happened to us and we learn to tell our stories from a place of hurt.
Our painful little stories grow inside of us and then when another bad situation happens, we link it back to our main story of hurt. After awhile, we become so attached to our tales of failure, blame, shame, pain, guilt and other triggers, that we end up creating more of the same emotional upsets which feed our deeply wounded story. We know that we don't want to live with the pain of it and yet we can't seem to escape from it despite what we think are our best efforts.
Unfortunately all too often, our best efforts are based on our avoidance to deal with the real issues of having to decipher the truth from the emotional covers and layers that we had to create to protect ourselves.
There is much more to be said about this but for today, I will leave you with this thought...
What you spend your time thinking about is what will show up in your life so choose the words to your story wisely.
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We have all been through some difficult times in our lives. They say that struggles are a part of the process of living and like it or not, we spend a great deal of time trying to make choices to avoid what will hurt us. We teach our children to stay away from strangers, to watch both ways when they cross the street and to work hard so that they don't fail. We are all programmed from an early age to watch out for danger and so we live our lives being aware that we must avoid anything that could harm us.
Unfortunately no matter how careful we are, we all experience some degree of hurt, loss, betrayal, failure and pain. When it happens, we try to deal with it using our limited experience, often based on our past and up-bringing. As we do, we quiet naturally make up a story about it in our heads because each and every one of us is a storyteller about our own lives. The trouble is that our stories are not always true. Too many times, they are based on our interpretations of what happened to us and we learn to tell our stories from a place of hurt.
Our painful little stories grow inside of us and then when another bad situation happens, we link it back to our main story of hurt. After awhile, we become so attached to our tales of failure, blame, shame, pain, guilt and other triggers, that we end up creating more of the same emotional upsets which feed our deeply wounded story. We know that we don't want to live with the pain of it and yet we can't seem to escape from it despite what we think are our best efforts.
Unfortunately all too often, our best efforts are based on our avoidance to deal with the real issues of having to decipher the truth from the emotional covers and layers that we had to create to protect ourselves.
There is much more to be said about this but for today, I will leave you with this thought...
What you spend your time thinking about is what will show up in your life so choose the words to your story wisely.
Sign up here to receive your copy of A Woman's Story - This Much I Know
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