Annie's story is familiar in some way to many women for we all seek acceptance
Yesterday, I kept thinking about ..."what do I want". And this a.m. I woke up with that on my mind... Something I always wanted all my life was to be "accepted" for what and who I am. It takes me back to a very long time ago when I first moved out on my own and I was always trying to find answers. Who am I? What is my purpose? What do I want? Why, what, where was always on my mind. One day I went to a physic fair by myself and the lady told me that as a little girl she saw me standing on the other side of the fence watching children play, but not joining in...waiting to be invited...and you know to this day...I'm not a joiner in anything...I do observe but do not take part.
I do believe the "acceptance" part stems back from growing up as a child of a broken family, only this time it was the father who kept the children because my mother left us behind. It was not a common situation back then and was frowned upon by so many in our small town. Kids at school made fun of me and called me names. I can still remember coming home from school and asking my father why we were different and why people made fun of us? He told me we were not different. He said people just had trouble accepting what happened to our family because they were afraid it would happen to them. I never forgot his wise words and yes I do think people judge others because they feel it will keep them safe from the same situations.
I was too young to have been rejected by my own mother. I realize now that the same little girl is still alive inside of me and she has not gotten over the rejection. It became the way I lived my life... always fearing the rejection. Now I finally realize that in order to heal myself, I must forgive her and everyone else who added pain into my life. Acceptance will always be very important to me but I have learned that it is more about me accepting others as they are rather than them accepting me. I have learned that if I am not accepted I just have to say in my mind...**** it, take me or leave me, you will no longer control my life!!!!
Watch this cute video ... just keep trying!!!!